Rainbow of Distraction?

This worries me that I may traverse in time and go back to doing whatever I felt like, not even believing consequences were real.  They didn’t touch me and I just didn’t care.  That was a very scary me, but she was free. 

 

I’m not sure freedom is worth the price of my humanity. 

 

 

On the upside, things that would make me very upset are not. 

 

Working nine hours a week and not being able to pay for anything.

 

Not being able to find a new job

 

There are other things, but I am unwilling to speak those aloud. 

 

The biggest upside to this kind of mood, my artistic side flourishes.  (At least in the past, I’m unsure whether she will rear her head or not this time)

 

I’ve been catching myself staring at things for no reason.

 

Joe will ask me what I’m thinking about, and I’ll realize, that I was in fact pondering nothing at all whatsoever.  Complete blankeroo between the eyes.

 

 

I’d apologize for myself, but I’m not sorry.  I’m putting down my thoughts exactly as they come to me, in a colorful, abstract manner.  Part of me hopes your intuitive side kicks in and reads behind the words, but the other part swears that no one can read behind words, because the “paper” is solid behind the “ink”